Move, You're In The Way

(Photo Source: www.utne.com)

        

     How many times have you been forcing to make something happen in your own strength? This past Sunday, as the Pastor touched on the Lord's Prayer. He described a story of a little boy who wanted to help his Daddy move a desk across the room. The father began pushing and the little boy braced his shoulder against the desk, and told his father, "Move Dad, you're in the way." Daddy of course chuckled and obliged his son's request.

The four year old little boy, pushed with all his might, but the desk would not move.

     Have you been there? You're working on a project with God, you know He's got your back, but the timing is moving too slow. Maybe it's not moving in the direction you wanted. You've told God, "Move out of the way, buddy, I got it," only to realize that when God steps back and says, "Have it your way," you find that life isn't moving anywhere?

     I've been there, in more ways that one. I was there for two years trying to get pregnant. I was there trying to make a career in management work. I was there when I was trying to avoid all charges of a felony offense. I was there when I was trying to make my marriage work.

     In case you haven't noticed, I tend to be a stubborn learner, with an education through the school of hard knocks, I've learned that unless I'm walking side by side with God, life doesn't move. If I run ahead of God, I'm pushing that desk all by myself. It's not until we invite God into our lives, that His strength begins being poured into us, when we say, "God, Your will be done, not mine. Walk with me Lord through this journey, show me Your way, and help me. I surrender."

    Yeah, I know what you're saying, "Surrender, that's a big word and huge effort." Surrendering doesn't mean we become powerless, it means we become filled with His power. It flows out of His spirit into ours, making the impossible happen.

   Whatever 'desk' you happen to be moving, invite God into your struggle, ask Him for help. You'll be amazed how quickly He moves. It reminds me of one of my favorite scripture verses:

I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency]. Philippians 4:13, Amplified Bible.

     

Choosing to Persevere Instead of Giving Up

    Don't give up. Persevere. Stand your ground. Keeping Trying. Do any of these sentences hold some weight with your heart? I believe they do. The Bible is full of scriptures about preserving what God has called us to do. Life itself with little ones will suck the strength out of us if we aren't careful to check our reserves.
    God places a dream on our hearts and children in our wombs. From there He tells us to focus on Him and what He has planned for us. As we journey on through our daily domestic duties, our persevere falters and we fail. We sit on the couch and wonder what to do next and think there is no point in trying again.
    As many times as I have thrown myself on the couch and given up, God paves the way right to my heart, reminding me that He has plans. Yet, those plans won't take shape unless I keep trying.  Galatians 6:9 leaped off the pages of my Bible, "And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." He then impressed upon me the image of what His Son did for us as He made His way to the hill where He would be crucfied. God was telling me that if His Son could do it, I could do the same for Him.
    No matter the dreams that God has laid on your heart, no matter the struggles you face while caring for your children, God is there cheering you on. He is insisting that you rest your gaze on Him and don't give up!

MomSense

    I think I'm finally getting used to my own ways of being a mom, everyone has a different mothering style, voice, tone, technique and approach. So imagine how excited I was to review this year's theme for MOPS and to read the book, MomSense. Jean Blackmer, an acquaintance of mine who wrote MomSense simplifies motherhood. Instead of getting caught up in the hype of what could damage your child, the best way to potty train, breast versus bottle, and more, she encourages moms to take in all the advice, listen to your own instincts and do what works for you and your family.
        This insight is something I definitely need to be reminded of often. I used to feel bad as I watched other moms use quiet tones and distractions, while I was busy defining exactly where the boundaries were each and every moment for my kids. My parenting style needed to be different and I wondered if it was such a bad thing. That's just it, MomSense is about trusting your own instincts, weighing the options of professional advice and running with what works for your child. Sometimes the stage changes and you have to stand back and weigh the options again. Learning to accept who you are and what works for your family makes motherhood oh so much easier, it takes the pressure off of competing to be mom of the year don't you think?

No Mother Ever Wants to Hear Her Child is Not Normal

     How is it that one moment can rock your world and change the course of life? Yet at the same time, it brings understanding to past moments of questioning and uncertainty. As I sat on my daughter's counselor's couch, I wanted to scream at her. The diagnosis she laid before me, shattered my reality, and at the same time brought clarity to every question I ever had about my daughter. It brought me face to face with my deepest fear as a mother.
    No mother ever wants to hear their child is not normal (I'd really like to ring the person's neck who created the word normal). No mother wants to her their child will struggle. Sure all of our children will struggle in life as they grow up; but to know your child will struggle even harder than the rest is beyond heartbreaking. 
    While I'm still grieving the dreams I had for my daughter and even facing my own demons of 'what will other people think' (once again, thank you mom for this wonderful Shaw trait), a dear friend wrote the sweetest of words to me as I poured my heart out to her. She told me God already knew all of this, He already planned it. Life isn't about what we make it, but how each struggle, and each life brings glory to Him. Am I willing to abandon it all for Him?
     Whether or not this diagnosis is truth (we are getting a 3rd opinion in July from a specialist), my mind was flooded continuously with words from a worship song. Over and over I heard ever so softly to abandon everything I had dreamed; to stand with my arms held high. He stood before creation with my baby in mind, He knew exactly what He was doing when He gave her to me. Nothing is ever as it seems.
     For now, I will grieve what I had planned and lay to rest what normal is. As the tears subside, I will be able to look towards the future and God. I'll keep my eyes on Him and ask, "Alright, so this is Your plan, You created her perfectly in Your image. Help me to walk along side her to the life You called her. Help me to see Your beauty in all of this. For heaven's sake, take the word normal out of dictionary!" 

The Art of Training-- Adventuresome Kids

     I'm always apologizing for my children. I mean, I am constantly cringing and saying I'm sorry to the children's pastors at church, Sunday school teachers, babysitters, and even friends. Considering that I have three high energy (imagine the energizer bunny on crack and sugar combined), strong willed, and adventuresome kiddos, it's no surprise that apologizing constantly has become the norm. 

     Just this evening, my husband chased our two year back into the house after she bolted outside into the pouring rain while wearing her princess dress. This was the encore of the evening. My son almost never makes it through Wednesday night church programs before we get called, or he is sitting with the children's pastor, and Tori is in a class with seven little boys, all of which are afraid of her. My oldest child is fine so long as her impulses don't get the best of her.

      It wasn't until the other evening as I walking with a VERY good friend of mine, that she shed light on the verse Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Most of the time when this scripture is unpacked in study, one thinks it means to train a child up in the ways of God. While the essence of training a child in God's ways are important, Audra, explained that it means we are to train up our child in how God packaged them. Instead of apologizing for my kids adventurous spirits, I need to embrace each personality and direct each one into becoming the person God created them to be. 

     Each of my wild-eyed, precious babes have a unique personality, will, and talents. Every moment I get as their mother, I need to tailor as learning moments towards who they are. Audra's words were so simple, yet so profound. I don't have this mothering thing down to a art yet, but each new day is a chance to mold them into who God created them to be. Yes, I'm sure I will still be apologizing on some level for some stunt they've pulled. In the mean time, I'll be looking for each opportunity to not only embrace who they are, but to enjoy WHO they are. 

God's Way Or My Way

What dreams have do you have in your heart? Have you been chasing after them and wondering where God is in the big picture? I've been asking the same questions myself lately over a dream that I've had. This month was supposed to be the month for it to happen. So when the answer to my heart's desire was "No," I had to question the answer, and then question God. When God doesn't answer your prayers, it's because He has something else in mind for you. Stop for a moment and look around you. Ask what is He doing in your life, then ask Him to be a part of it. The gifts He's given you and the talents He's created in you are for His purpose and plans. Through His ways, He will full-fill your desires and dreams. It takes faith, obedience, acceptance, and asking to be a part of His plans. 

"My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,' says the Lord.

'For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways,

And My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9.

Heart Of The Home Challenge.

                                                                                    For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 6:23 NASB.

    From the moment our child can comprehend right and wrong, they are given choices. They can choose to obey Mommy, or they can choose to break the rules. Sometimes the consequences are immediate like touching a hot stove, and other times the consequence are delayed, like being disciplined after Mommy finds the mess of chocolate syrup under the bed. 
     As mothers we pray our children will come to know and love Jesus, serving Him for a lifetime. But what happens when an adult chooses to live a life for themselves? You know what I'm talking about? Choosing not to abstain from sex outside of marriage, choosing to gossip, choosing to lie, choosing to be the best person possible but NOT choosing Jesus.  We have but a precious few years on here on earth to decide what will happen to us beyond the grave. After all, the grave isn't the ending point, it's the stepping stone to the rest of our eternal lives. 
   

    With these thought always in the back of my mind, I clearly set the boundaries for my kids. They are learning right and wrong; and the consequence of poor choices. My goal is for them to transfer this obedience into their hearts for Christ. 

 As adults our consequences can be immediate or delayed when it comes to accepting Jesus as our Savoir and choosing to live a life for Him. We may live a life being the best mom possible and strive to maintain high morals. Or we may follow our heart thinking that it's okay to sleep with our boyfriend, or make other poor choices. Life can go on until we meet death in our sleep; or Death could be waiting for you tomorrow morning. Are you willing to take that chance?  Where is your heart today? Does it belong to Jesus or to yourself? 

Catalyst and Scars

              There has been obstacles and trials in life that brought me to my knee's in wonderment "Why God, why this? Why did You have to allow this or couldn't You have prevented it somehow?" Then I pick myself up, dust myself off and keep moving forward trying to put the past behind me and embrace the new day. I've had many experiences where I question the meaning in all of it leaving me in frustration. It wasn't until last night in during a youth outreach event in a small Nebraska town that I finally understood the scars I bear. Not a word was said and yet the message was loud and clear; someone else had been in their shoes. They saw my arms, looked down at their shoes before staring me directly in the eye.
        Teens today are facing the same enemies  of loneliness, worthlessness, and the same old lies in a more covert disguise. This time the stakes are much higher. Instead of knowing that one day they will grow out of it, more and more teens are turning to permanent solutions for temporary problems. The results can lead to a lifetime of regret or become deadly. For the teens, it was like a breath of fresh air besides shock to hear an adult echo what they are currently struggling with. 
     In a world full of technology, social media, computers, and text messages, the soul is growing ever increasingly lonely and looking for a connection, something meaningful to embrace. All that's needed to fight the lies we are all faced with when we are alone is for one person to reach out and say "I care". It only takes one person to the be catalyst to change in someone else's life. Are you going to be the change? 

Every 26 Seconds

       Every 26 seconds, a teen girl in the Amercia becomes pregnant, and 11 years ago, I was one of them...I'm familiar with the heartbreak and the struggle to break free from being a statistic. Without my husband (my boyfriend), and my strong desire to give my babies everything, I wouldn't be where I am now; providing a stable home.
    Shows like 16 and Pregnant show the harsh realities of teen motherhood. It puts a glaring spot light of the epidemic affecting teens. The pressures and longings of sex versus love.  As I mentor teen moms through Teen Mops (Mothers of Preschoolers), I get know their background, their heartbreaks, and their dreams. There's no difference in the desires they have for their kids versus any other mom minus the age. They want a better life for their child, and struggle to provide that while still growing up themselves. Each mom has a story and wants to leave a different legacy for their child. It's up to us to provide support, resources, and Christ's example to help them create a better life.

      Motherhood is supposed to be a season in which we can't wait be feel our baby move, wear maternity clothes, drink in our babies smell, love on them, and enjoy the moments we spend with our baby. While we have our worries about getting enough sleep and if our husbands get to spend enough time with our children; my teens worry about how they are going to make it. They worry about making ends meet as they work one or more full time jobs, on top of going to school. They worry about meeting their educational requirements to get into college. They worry about whether or not they've worked enough hours at Walmart. Still being kids themselves, they feel guilty about missing their high school years and all the parties. The part they worry the most about is all the hours their children are in daycare. If that doesn't seem stressful enough, they are still learning to navigate the waters of being a teenager, parenting, relationships, and dreams.     
    Each of my girls have one desire, for their surrounding community to know they are doing the best they can and they are good moms. Most of my girls have matured so much since they've given birth. They now see the tragic circumstances that brought them into early motherhood. Aware of the pattern of dysfunctions from their childhood; they are trying to create a new life for themselves and their child, while breaking the cycle.Each mom is in the process of using resources and parenting skills they have to create a better life. All of them want nothing more than to stay home with their child.  
       It's up to us as a community to invest ourselves into teens before and after they become pregnant, preferably before. If we can pour ourselves into them, we can help them take a stand. To know they are worth waiting for in a world where sleeping with a cute boyfriend is the norm. Teen moms are coming from broken homes, as well as stable homes. They are looking to fill the gap their families are supposed to fill or somehow missed. Most girls have stories like mine. Without a father around and my mom working all the time, I felt insignificant, and in many ways not worthy of saving myself for marriage. When I started dating my boyfriend, I gave into the pressures of sex. It was something so grown up! By giving into my boyfriend, I thought he was showing me love in return. It was something physical and tangible that I could measure. Looking back I know my boyfriend would have loved me if I had chosen to wait. 11 years later we are still together, but keep in mind, we are one of the few rare couples that do and it hasn't been easy. We've had to fight for every inch we've gained.
      Each day is a chance to make a new choice. Though small and seemingly insignificant, one choice builds on another. Combined these choices equal self sacrifice. Hopefully one day as I pour out my time and prayers for each mama, I pray each of them will reach their full potential as they step into the world of mothering.

Translation Please

   

 I used to despise the Bible and anyone who carried one. I avoided churches, and those people who seemed to radiant all kinds of goodness in the grocery stores. I couldn't imagine why anybody would let some book and some guy who died 2000 years ago dictate every part of his or her life. I was too busy chasing empty relationships, wanting to be everyone friend, climbing the career ladder, and investing in materialistic things.
    Fast forward a few years later, and I now have three different translations and a mini purse Bible that isn't just a purse accessory... Looking back to the B.C. (Before Christ) days, there is definitely something about the Holy Spirit moving in mysterious ways. Part of why I didn't like the Bible was because I didn't understand it. The words I read didn't resonate with my spirit. Why would I want to spend time reading something that I struggled to understand?
 I remember waking up the morning after giving my heart to God. I grabbed the Bible that was given to me and began reading. The words spoke volumes to my heart and I couldn't read enough of it. So how do you explain this to your non Christian friends? Call me girlie and whimsical...I parallel my transformation to that of a butterfly. Before its a butterfly, its a catapillar. Catapillars can only see exactly whats in front of them and generally have a one track mind, food! It's hungry and continues to eat holes through leaf after leaf looking for the next big one that happens to branch into its path. Then Christ comes along knocking and the struggle begins. Which one will it surrender too? The freedom and bird's eye view after struggling out of its caccoon or death? When you surrender to God, a whole new world opens up. Instead of inching along the ground on your belly trying to meet your needs; God's spirit carries you.
I like the set of wings He's given me. Though I have struggles of day to day life, His whispers of love carry me.

Thy Remote is my Comfort I shall NOT want

     
     I've got a dirty little secret. Do you want to know what it is? Shhhhh, and lean in closer. I've been ignoring God. And to think I've been doing it during the most precious season too. As most of you mama's know, being in full swing of motherhood on top of the holiday season has brought out the lazy side of me. The days begin before I'm even out of bed as I referee from under the sheets between the match of iron wills amongst my youngest two. Before I'm dressed my first daycare kiddo is shoved through my front door. The rest of the day is spent keeping kids either interactively busy or in time outs and my evenings are spent helping my oldest with homework and organization... So when nap time arrives I fall into bed with the T.V. remote in hand, ignoring that inner tug to pick up my Bible or pray. All I want to do is zone out on mindless shows like Grey's Anatomy.
     I've prayed for the desire to want to read my Bible, I've asked for forgiveness of ignoring God's tug to spend time with Him. I've tried to discipline myself to read, only to fall asleep five minutes into reading. Each day that passes, His voices grows smaller and I grow CRABBIER. What's the big deal some of you are asking? It's not like I'm ignoring my kids while watching T.V. or facebooking. In reality, it is a big deal. It's about pressing into God and learning what He has in store for me. It's about lifting up my cares, troubles, anxieties, praises and letting God deal with it. It's about growing into His likeness and allowing Him to mold me. It's about serving Him, after all He sent His Son to for me... It's about being obedient to His call. How can I expect my children to be obedient to me if I cannot be obedient to Him in something so small, so simple?
     The other day as I fell onto my bed with the sounds of snoring come from my little ones, I heard Him say, "That remote gives you more comfort that you let me give you." OUCH! So with that said, I am asking for accountability as I swear off TV for the rest of the holiday season and get back into the habit and WANT of spending time with God.
      It may not seem like a big deal to you, however as a baby Christian, I have much to learn. In the scriptures Christ talks about each of us having been made by the hand of God for a purpose and each of us has our own race to run. When I am not praying or reading my Bible daily, I am not walking in the spirit with God. Instead I'm walking in my humanness and allowing my spirit to detach itself from Christ. I'm slowly starving my spirit to death. What kind of example am I setting for my children and what kind of discernment will I have if I haven't the strength or the connection with God? So with that I leave you with a poem from Marlene Bangull's Blog.

The Twenty-third Channel



The TV is my shepherd,


I shall want more.


It makes me lie down on the sofa.


It leads me away from the Scriptures.


It destroys my soul.


It leads me in the path of sex and violence


for the sponsor’s sake.


Yea, though I walk in the shadow


of my Christian responsibilities,


there will be no interruption,


for the TV is with me.


Its cable and remote control -


they comfort me.


It prepares a commercial before me


in the presence of my worldliness.


It anoints my head with humanism;


my coveting runneth over.


Surely laziness and ignorance shall follow me


all the days of my life,


and I shall dwell in the house


watching TV forever. Amen.

(Visit Marlene's blog at http://writehisanswer.wordpress.com/)

Thirsty?

   

         These last few months I have been hanging on by a thread to get through the daily domestic duties of mommy hood and life itself. The very idea of grocery shopping or playing with my kids wore me out. Tired and irritable were the words that described how I felt. Within an hour of being at the Women's Weekend Retreat, I was able to put a finger on it. I was spiritually burned out.
          While I was there God impressed on me through workshops, prayer, worship, I was running on empty. Empty as in this clay jar was cracked and couldn't hold any water. I enjoyed being in the presence of God and didn't this joy and sense of being poured into to leave me. So why was I so dry? I hadn't taken the time to fill my cup. Sure I read my bible, went to church, and sent up a few 'Help me' prayers; but that left me dry. Without posturing myself to hear from God and actually spending time with Him, what can I expect? So this week I tested my theory. Each day when I laid the kids down for nap (asleep or not), I got my journal and got alone with God. The outcome was a much happier, less irritable Mommy.

Raising Soldiers

   Here is a sample of what I've been working on. I decided to post this because I feel the need to rally the troops.

     There is a war brewing in America. The battle lines are being drawn and it’s starting in our schools. The primary targets are the minds of our children. We can no longer freely say ‘One nation under God.’ Children are discouraged from praying during lunch. Symbols of their faith are considered contraband because it may be offensive to others. Laws are being passed under discrimination that the public schools are to teach our children we should accept and tolerate homosexual relationships. Books are available in their libraries that teach God as some imaginary being like Santa Claus.


     There are many aspects and battle fronts to this war but the primary war is between Christianity and Secular Humanism. Secular humanism is a religion and philosophy of life which views man as the supreme being of the world. God and all the supernatural ‘stuff’ is mere fluff. It sees moral values as relative and varying from person to person. It sees these morals are personable until that person decides to change it, so long as it doesn’t hurt anybody else. We live in a day and age where double standards are acceptable and religion is considered intolerant.

     For several weeks my husband and I went back and forth over pulling our oldest daughter out of public school and putting her into Faith Christian School. Our main worry was whether or not we could afford it. We were concerned that some of the aspects Cheyenne was being taught to tolerate; and the current bills for laws that were currently sitting before the senate that dictate what should be taught in public schools. Our decision became clear after the principle of her school ignored the bullying that happened on the last day of school and his ‘good old boys club’ attitude in respect to disciplining the kids that were bullying her. After Obama became president and the lines between Christ and secular society were blown wide open, we didn’t regret our decision.

     Instead we breathed a sigh of relief. Though our faith is strong we are still new in Christ and feel that she needed a stronger foundation in her faith than what we can give her. Her new school does just that. It sparks conversations and leads us to debates with our Bibles in hand. As she encounters Christ’s word, it is building up her faith and reinforcing her armor she puts on daily as she walks out the door. The school is teaching her who Christ created her to be and is encouraging her giftings (and school isn't one of them). It has raised the standard in our home, and that standard is to live for Christ. In the Bible the word standard was translated in many texts to mean banner. A banner is just that, a standard. In the ancient of days, banners were carved on wood and metals that represented a clan or nations ideals’. This banner or flag could be seen from a distance and was often a rallying point for troops just before battle. It was raised high during critical times in the battle to boost the soldier’s moral, to help them find their strength and remind them what they were fighting for. My dear little mama, it’s all coming down to the final wire, the final battle. In these last of days, you and I both need to decide how we are going to raise our children. If I’m not mistaken, you love Christ and the choice is clear. It’s time to raise our banners high so others can see that we serve Christ. We serve a God who does not tolerate double standards and will not make light of how society has debunked Him and His kingdom. It's time as parents to no longer tolerate what society is deeming as acceptable. Listen to the music your children listen to. If it tugs at your gut, throw it out. Make a stand to not allow some questionable movies be viewed in your home. Draw the line between acceptable friendships and not so acceptable friendships. Moniter what your child is being taught in school. You may live in a rural town in America, but you will be suprised what is being taught, even in the Bible belt of the U.S. Take a stand and raise your standards so your children will know what to strive for.

     It may seem like we are losing this battle and that may be so in terms of being able to pray and worship freely. However don’t forget what Yahweh Nissi means. Yahweh Nissi means The Lord is My Banner. Moses built an alter and called our Heavenly Father our banner after victory over the Amalekites. It was their first battle after being freed from Egypt. When you pray and call on Yahweh Nissi, you are calling on a God that is powerful enough to overcome any foe and that includes the enemy who disguises himself as secular humanism.

     Though the battle is great and our soldiers are going into battle as young as two; our father God is shinning His light over our children. Start teaching your children how to put on their armor and pray for their safety each day before they go off to play or head off to school. Finally let your banner be raised high so it can be seen from a distance as an encouragement to those who are fighting in this battle with us.

1.Putting on the full armor of God is a tedious but necessary process. So here is the scripture listed below and then an example of how to teach your children to pray.



The Armor of God

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints (Ephesians 6:13-18 NIV).





How to Put On the Armor of God

Father God, we thank You for today and we ask that You watch over us as we go about our day. Help me to put on my armor so that I am protected, and can stand up in the battle. First I pray that You help me protect my mind with the Helmet of Salvation, help me to make right decisions. Next I pray that you protect my heart with the Breast Plate of Righteousness and I ask forgiveness for my sins. Help me to obey you. Next I pray that You help me remember that You are truth as I put on The Belt of Truth. It will help remind me of all that I know about You. Also I pray that as I put on my Sandals of Peace that You guide my feet to where they should go. Help me to carry my Shield of Faith as it will help protect me from doubt and to keep the enemy away. Last I pray You help me carry the Sword of the Spirit which is Your word. Use it to guide my way today. In Jesus’ name amen.